Gaslighting is a form of psychological abuse where a person or group makes someone question their sanity, perception of reality, or memories. People experiencing gaslighting often feel confused, anxious, and unable to trust themselves.
Jazz believes he asked at 2 that the Good Fairy would come and exchange his penis for a vagina. At an age where most children don’t yet have a grasp on word formation, let alone talking in fill sentences. At 2 it is common for children to talk in their “own language” of babbles.
He must have been an exceptionally advanced child.
Or his mother may be Ret-Conning the story. Jeanette Jennings says “we weren’t encouraging, we were supportive“.That way she can deny that she guided him his journey, both to the media and eventually to Jazz. If it turns out that this was a mistake, a decision taken too young, the Jennings parents can tell Jazz that it was all his idea. She won’t have to take responsibility for the way they committed a young child onto a pathway of living on a reality show, enacting ‘feminine’ stereotypes, taking drugs and undergoing multiple genital surgeries.
When asked if she’s a “Stage Mom” Jeanette Jennings makes it all about her. “I don’t enjoy being on television” she does it for the kids. Won’t somebody think of the children? But not the welfare of her own children.
Mum appears to be in charge, but Dad is fully on board with this gaslighting.
Stereotyping: An article in the American Sociological Review states that a person using gaslighting techniques may intentionally use negative stereotypes of a person’s gender, race, ethnicity, sexuality, nationality, or age to manipulate them. For example, they may tell a female that people will think she is irrational or crazy if she seeks help for abuse.
Or they may tell a child they cannot play with stereotypical “girls” toys or that “boys don’t wear dresses”. Children trust their parents. The child wants to wear a dress, only girls wear dresses, so the child must be a girl. It’s logic you might expect from a child under 5. Guess what, these children are under 5.
Rather have a straight daughter than a gay son
Which 2 year old knows that a penis prevents them from playing with sparkly toys?
Which 2 year old knows that a penis can be swapped for a vagina?
Which child is told that they need to swap gender in order to wear what they want to wear and play with their toys?
This child – Son of Brandon Boulware
I did not let my child wear girl clothes … I did it to protect myself.
She asked me if she put on boy’s clothes could she go out to play.
My daughter was equating being good with being someone else.
We allowed her to be who she is – to grow her hair, to wear girl’s clothes.
Perhaps he picked up on the parental anxiety that “girl clothes” were inappropriate. Brandon had an escape plan that allowed his on to wear dresses and go play: he could become a she.
This Child – Kai Shappley
I thought this kid might be gay… Googling conversion therapy. … spanking her, really spanking her, for saying she’s a girl … my child was praying to die.
Perhaps because he gets beaten whenever he wants to play with girl toys, he insists he is a girl.
Mother, Kimberley Shappley, is another stage mom. Kai stars as the trans character in The Babysitter’s Club reboot for Netflix.
This Child – Jackie Green , Son of Susie Green (CEO of Mermaids)
I thought I had an effeminate, quite sensitive little boy who was probably gay.
But Jack’s Dad did not approve.
His mother went on to lead the UK’s foremost charity for ‘trans kids’, gaslighting parent’s and children into believing that wearing a dress makes a child ‘trans’.
The Good Fairy Comes When You Are Older
Think of Jazz Jennings, waiting to be old enough so the Good Fairy can come and take his penis away. He tells ABS Nightline that “confirmation surgery” is the final step in transition so he can finally be the woman he really is.
Seeing a friend post a picture to Facebook of himself in drag, with the caption “She’s got legs”. I commented that “He’s got legs” and he responded by letting me know that he is happy to be thought of as a woman while in drag.
It got me thinking.
Men wear drag. Why is it that we pretend this makes them women? Only men dress outlandishly as a caricature of femininity.
Surely we look at these images and see males.
There are men who dress as Barbara Streisand and Bette Middler, paying tribute to remarkable trail-blazing women of show biz. It certainly takes talent to transform a man into a simulacra of a well-known female and for him to study and emulate her every gesture with precision. He belts out their best numbers while cinched in a corset and tucked into lycra pantyhose. Hats off to that bloke, a true performer who’d make it in any musical.
Once upon a time, in 1992
RuPaul is a proud “female impersonator” who became famous for his glam image of womanhood. For being very good at drag without impersonating a particular woman. He wasn’t alone in the glam and sexy look – Madonna had been doing suspenders in public for a decade. In the 1990s he sparked interest and controversy by being very, very, ridiculously good-looking in a high-cut bikini.
In full-swing, he could have been a less-wholesome Whitney Houston. He made no bones about being a man. A pretty man, a fashionable man with legs for days and a glamorous wardrobe. But a man.
Only a man spends 6 hours donning a a costume to be a less-wholesome Whitney Houston. Whitney just slips on her dress and her smile lights up the room.
Bitchy and Scratchy
“Nine out of 10 of the people who audition for our show, they’ll say these words — and it’s funny ’cause we all laugh every time we hear it — they say, ‘Honey, I will cut a b—-!’” he told Vanity Fair.
RuPaul about his show RuPaul’s Drag Race, Vanity Fair
For men, shouting “giiiiiirl frieeeeeend” and calling one another bitch seems to be a core aspect of drag. Why? On which planet do women speak in this way?
I believe the cattiness originates from an innate defensiveness. Drag queens started as homosexual men acting out their persona as “not real men”. The logic goes “homosexuals aren’t real men; since I’m not a man then am I a woman? I’ll show you what a woman is”. And then being prickly, bitchy and defensive on all sides because he’s ‘not a man’, and not a woman either. The liminal gatekeeper between worlds, but not in either.
In the iconic Aussie film “The Adventures of Priscilla: Queen of the Desert“, Hugo Weaving’s character journeys across Australia to confront the material fact that he has a son, he is indeed a man not a stylised barbie doll. He ceases to be liminal and becomes real, material, with relationships that require the bitchy defences to come down. He slips off his wig, humble and vulnerable, and waits for his boy to judge him a poor father. Like Pinocchio perhaps, he is a now real boy. He can’t afford to keep being the bitch.
Participating in patriarchy makes women defensive and bitchy like that because they have to compete for men as a resource. We aren’t all sisters all the time. Our looks are up for scrutiny, our academic credentials, our performance in the sack and our love of manly games like football. Have ever heard a man looking for a wife who talks about his list? “And she likes footy: tick, tick, tick”.
But women aren’t always on the defensive. We have struggles in common and recognise that on many levels, being a bitch won’t get you far.
Drag is a Boy’s Club
Women aren’t permitted to do drag. The 2020 article “Can Women Be Drag Queens“, Vivian Manning-Schaffel asks “some women have been inspired to try it out. But should they?”. The article goes on to talk about how for women, drag is about smashing the patriarchy by becoming a caricature sex doll.
She talks about the aspects of drag that appeal to women – building community through being (no joke) a bio-queen.
Quoting Peppermint, a drag queen and trans identified man, offers some insights into women who do drag. On why women might do it, he notes that most of his clientele are women and “eventually they will emulate the people they admire’.
Additionally he notes
… drag requires a willingness, or even a desire, to challenge gender norms, challenge the patriarchy, look like a fool in a dress and a wig. … There’s only a few who can and I think most of those people are women.
So, women who do drag are emulating men, and are good at it because they readily allow themselves to act like fools. Smash that patriarchy ladies.
The wikipedia article on female drag queens calls them “Faux Queens”. Only a woman can be a faux queen.
Only a man can be a queen.
RuPaul has banned females from his show. Why?
“Drag loses its sense of danger and its sense of irony once it’s not men doing it, because at its core it’s a social statement and a big f-you to male-dominated culture. So for men to do it, it’s really punk rock, because it’s a real rejection of masculinity.”
I actually like this reason. When men can confront, play with and subvert masculinity, we’re on the way to them figuring out that it’s all a charade. That there’s not much between pants and a skirt. Masculine dress a consensus of fabric, masculine behaviours might prove just as evanescent. In the 80’s, glam and hair metal bands grasped masculinity by the cojones and said “enough is enough”. They aren’t queens. They are manly men, taking on “feminine” dress as an F U to the idea of what a man should be.
While Dee Snider (right) from Twisted Sister dressed in a garish drag designed to shock, was singing “We’re not gonna take it”, Poison (left) sang
What’s got you so jumpy? Why can’t you sit still, yeah? Like gasoline, you wanna pump me And leave me when you get your fill, yeah – Unskinny Bop, Poison
Like gasoline, you wanna pump me. Sure I do.
Drag loses its sense of danger and its sense of irony once it’s not men doing it
I don’t think RuPaul’s drag race cuts the mustard with respect to subversion and danger. As a queen of the 90’s, RuPaul made people question. Not “what is a woman” but “is glitter what makes you female?'”. Also “whoa dude, that chick is hot; what it’s not a chick?”
There’s no danger in this lot. Except the danger they might fall to their death from the towering shoes.
I’ll admit to enjoying some drag, and retching at some drag also. I admire the showmanship of some performers, the really good performers. I’m not keen on the casual bitchy high-wigged sex dolls who’s talent is putting stabbing people in the eye with a set of fake bazoongas (or breasts, for the normal people in my readership).
You have to admit some drag names are hilarious – Helena Handbasket, Fibonaci Sequins, Allison Chains, and Patti O’Furniture Dora Jar to name but a few. There’s great creativity to be had in mucking about with costumes and stage personas. I love dressing up (down and sideways) and think more people should have fun with their clothing. Drag is a part of grown up play with clothing.
But does drag challenge the patriarchy? I don’t believe so. It plays to the pornified image of female sexuality. No drag queen gets a period. No drag queen grunts and s*ts himself during labour. A drag queen is a ‘woman’ for a few hours on a Friday night.
Men like RuPaul went a fair way to expose the fact “feminine” is simply costume, but few people got the message.
Earlier this week Posie Parker being banned from Spring for hosting hateful t-shirts bearing the “Woman: Adult Human Female” definition. In her honour, I started my own account on Spring, where you can buy shirts with the same message.
I’ve also added one with the Yogyakarta definition of gender, which covers a LOT more of the shirt. I think you get better mileage out of it.
I’ve called my store Stxndxng fxr Wxmxn because we all know how vowels can be triggering.
Critical Thinking in a Passive World attended the Pride in Sport webinar on “TRANSforming Sport in Australia” and has written an excellent report.
As you know, I have a soft sport for Pride in Sport, or PiS as they prefer to be called. I had registered for this webinar and was really looking forward to it, but couldn’t make it at the last minute. I was disappointed.
The extent of their “challenges” within Australian sport was discussed, and it boils down to:
2) Changing in change rooms
I will address each of these so-called challenges in this article, and will be pulling from over 20 years of first-hand experience with sport, including 7 years of playing different types of sport, along with research and information from other credible sources.